Dating is so exciting, but it can also feel intense. New people who might prefer a different pace, or maybe feeling pressure to impress. Here are 4 tips to make dating work for you, so you can show up as your amazing self.
Communicate your pace
Dating is a great way to learn about yourself, and to explore what pace you prefer to move at. If you notice your pace is a little slower than someone you’re interested in, don’t feel pressured to move at their speed if it feels unnatural. Try saying something like "I'm really enjoying getting to know you, and I’d love to keep exploring this at a pace that feels natural. For me, that means taking things slow." The right person will understand.
Try not to overthink it
It’s easy to get caught up in worrying about how you might come across on a date, but this only takes you out of the moment. Try to shift your thinking away from outcomes and impressions to simply connecting with your date and being yourself. It’s not about perfecting every moment.
Be honest with yourself
Are there specific parts of dating that feel hard? Maybe it’s just the first date? Fear of time commitment? Or maybe you’re worried about saying the wrong thing? Try putting your feelings on paper. Writing things down can help you pinpoint exactly why you’re tired of dating, so you can explore ways to work through that particular thing while still enjoying the process.
Choose the right date setting
Where you pick for a date can make all the difference in how comfortable you feel. Worried about it lasting too long? Meet at a café near closing time. Anxious about lulls in conversation? Book an activity to help keep the chat flowing. Think about what will help ease the pressure so you can just enjoy hanging out.
Now, hopefully you feel like you can make dating work for you. Go find someone great and try to get to know them with these things in mind.